To be honest, this is a really hard one for me. One of my major faults is that I tend to always see the negative in things; rarely seeing the beauty in the immediate. I should change that word choice from "rarely" to "never". A flaw that needs to be worked on, and kicked out of my mind set, I know. Even my own mindset on today proves that - I lost out on a teacher for student teaching next year, my foot hurts, I don't feel well, not enough in the bank, I had to pay too much to get my tabs renewed (why do they need so much for taxes, again????), and I walked in the door to find out my daughter didn't obey me as she should have. Grr, grrr, grr, bad day abounding.
So what is there to love right now, honestly? For starters, I have a home when so many around me do not. All it takes is a five minute walk down my street for me to see the homeless. So many homeless, and the temperatures are plunging below freezing levels - and no, I do not intend to comment on why anyone is homeless, or play any blame game, it is sad no matter how it is looked at.
Next, I have two children who love me. Instead of focusing how I never have me time, don't get enough sleep, or how I'd love to have a third but can't afford it, I need to see the struggle of some people working to hard to be able to have one child, let alone two (or, in some countries, aren't allowed to have more). Yet here I am with two cute kids who have their morals in line with how they should be, and are always on the lookout of putting others first.
I have a husband who loves me, his children, and works hard at a job that physically breaks him every day. He may not be a doctor, or a lawyer, or have everything in line (to be honest, do any of us really have life all figured out?), but he does give it his all to help support us in any way that he can.
While most of you probably are hitting the upper hundreds with your friends lists, I have a small group whom I know love me, care for me, and will always be there in the event that something horrible happens. These people also love my children, and have shown them a tremendous amount of support. So, though it bothers me that the list gets smaller and smaller all the time, I love that it has shown me who is truly going to be there in the end, no matter what, and that those left are an incredible group of individuals.
Another thing I have, and love, is the fact that I am employed. After bouncing around for years due to the economy, and finding what was the best fit for me, I am about to celebrate my 3rd year with the Bethel School District. Not only that, but this job helped me accept, with ease, the career choice of teaching. Pretty cool and snazzy when it comes down to it. And I work with a teacher who lets me try things, and is open to teaching me new things about my future field. So, I may not be in the "career" of choice that can make my family proud, yet, but this was the essential door opener to get me there.
Lastly, I have been given the opportunity of an education. I was forced to attend community college at a young age, and having completed an associates by the time I was 20 helped me be able to finish my bachelors degree so quickly. So many people around the world cannot afford to go to school, or do not have the ability to go around their work schedules. Thankfully, Western Governors University was created in my life time so that it is a reality. Though I hate the stress, staying up late, waking up early, and the worry of how to get placed for student teaching... I love that I have been able to do this.
After having taken the scenic route, I think I am able to say that I love all of the polished parts of my very unpolished life. It will never be perfect, and there will be hundreds of days where I think "grr to you all", but deep down I know that I have all that I need, and that can be enough to make me love my life.
Bree Brown says that if you have one or two people in your life who will help you "move a body" then you are doing extremely well indeed. I think that's true for pretty much all of us. x
ReplyDeleteI like that saying!
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