The Learning Mom

Kids with Rosie the Riveter

With Mother's Day fast approaching I continually see articles about the need to praise/thank/give gifts to mother's to they know their value. As a mother, I love receiving all of the above, and it definitely helps keep me charged for a few months in knowing I am loved when those moments strike where it seems the household (i.e. my two beautiful children) are against me.

What has been on my mind, though, is not the praise I should receive (and hopefully will get this Sunday), but all of the things I have learned by having my kids. Below are the top five, in no real order.

1. No matter the age, if a child can speak they are capable of having some sort of intellectual conversation. Not only that, but they are way more perceptive than most of us give them credit for. My daughter, at age five, has had conversations with me about things she has seen on the news. For years she has been able to sense when I am upset, who it is at, and why, and will often reward me with a huge and kiss, accompanied by an "it'll be alright mommy" to cheer me up.



Though blurry, my daughter learned about women's
 roles in the workforce by choice and sought out opportunities
for pictures by things she saw as monumental

2. Cleanliness is good, perfection is not. My children will see me cleaning (and before I get any envious comments, this is not a daily occurrence) and will jump in to try and help. As mom, I have ways that I like things to be done, and rarely are the toddlers able to accomplish things to my satisfaction. What I have learned, though, is to let it go and show them how grateful I am that they are trying: There is nothing more disheartening to a child then to see someone following along behind to pick up the pieces. So what if my carpet doesn't have the nice lines in it, or my dishwasher is loaded funny. They both get an A for effort!
3. Though they may not be able to do much, kids in the kitchen (or alongside whatever your hobby may be) will create future memories and skills. It makes them feel important knowing that they are helping mom (much like the cleaning), and nothing makes them more proud than seeing their hard work put on the table.



My little guy helping make cornbread

4. Create an atmosphere of forgiveness. Sure, kids mess up and knowingly do so, but don't you as a parent maybe yell or do things you shouldn't as well? I know as a mother of two young kids (to be honest, even in being an employee, wife, part of a community, etc) I can be stressed and snap much too easily and my two lovelies are always quick to forgive, and provide a hug. So, unless their behavior truly is toxic (ex. stealing, lying, hitting, etc) and very repetitive offer up forgiveness and acceptance of their humanity. Not only will it create a better home atmosphere, but it will also teach them to forgive others that cross their paths later in life who have made mistakes as well.
5. I wish my home was always perfect and in tip top shape (Krystal has me on that, her time management skills are to kill for), I have learned that when my time is not managed well (and unless it has to do with work, it rarely is) that it is alright to leave the laundry for tomorrow, do the dishes later,  and leave the weeds for another sunny day so long as I can create a memory of my kids smiling. Growing up, my mother was a pack rat and I remember this only when truly focusing in on how things used to be. What I do clearly remember: Family bike rides, playing catch, going shopping, planting flowers, and learning how to play duets on the piano. In no way am I saying let the house fall apart, or that those who do have the perfect schedule to achieve everything are wrong. What I am suggesting is if there is an opportunity to create a memory, take it. 50 years from now you will be sharing those memories about what "little mommy/daddy" did as a child with your grand-babies.

There you have it, that is my list that I know will grow throughout the years. If you have a list of your own please share! Have a Happy Mother's Day everyone!