Simple Poems for My Loves

Today, Mama Kat asks that we "[w]rite a poem to your love for Valentine’s Day". I am not a poetic person, and have always struggled with any sort of creative writing. What I can do, though, is write a cinquain.

While it says to write it about my love, I want to write it for my two kids as well, as they are a part of my heart and were given to me by my husband. A day about love would not be complete without them!

Ken

 Friendly, talkative, unique

Lover of all things nerdy.
Supportive, humorous
Hubby

Reyna
Creative, helpful, passionate
Animal helper in the making.
Huggable, cuddly
Reyna-Roo

Bub
Determined, intent, empathetic
The knowledge keeper of all things shark and dinosaur.
Playful, curious
Chef Bubba
 

Friday Fit Day - Eating Clean

My whole life I have been on some form of diet - Atkins, calorie counting, fat counting, South Beach, you name it. And, every time I went on a diet it would work until I plateaued, and then I would either gain or need to find a new approach. This lasted until I had kids, and then everything spiraled out of control. I tried the calorie counting, again, and to eat fewer processed foods. It would barely work, between 1-5 pounds lost after working really, really hard (and, by working, I'm including working my behind off in exercise).

Recently, a little less than a month ago, I started having some horrible, horrible symptoms. In retrospect, over the last two years I'd had similar attacks, but on a much smaller scale.  My throat felt like it was closing, swallowing was difficult (and I had to put forth an intense amount of concentration to do it), numbness, and heart palpitations that made me feel as though it was trying to beat its way out of my chest. Over the last few years, this would happen (not including the numbness and swallowing) and then would disappear and not show up again for many months. As it became more, and more, frequent I began tossing ideas around on whether or not it was heart related, anxiety, etc. A trip to the hospital confirmed nothing was actually wrong with me, but to stay away from caffeine temporarily.

That, that has been an insanely hard road to go down. Pain, irritation, on one occasion there was vomiting, but I did it. Yet I still did not feel better. A trip to the doctor gave me an indication that this is, more than likely, allergy related (testing next week), and I was given an epi pen in case of emergency. That did not sit well with me, at all. So I decided it was time to take some drastic measures so that I did not feel like I was about to die every night.

And that, everyone, led me down the path of clean eating. Since I am not 100% positive what it is that is triggering things (although I am almost completely certain it is MSG), it seemed to make the most sense to eliminate anything processed. The reason I came to this conclusion is because, after sitting down and processing, I realized that all of my "attacks" had food in common. I would eat, say, Doritos, and all of a sudden be pacing the floor wondering if I needed to call 911 or not. Between Google and my thoughts, I realized that I had almost every single symptom of someone allergic to MSG, which is in practically everything that is processed. And delicious. And addictive.

While doing my research, I found that scientists believe (although haven't entirely proven) that MSG usage can remove the ability to lose weight, no matter what the calorie intake and exercise effort are. As I kept eliminating more and more types of foods, and even drinks (sadly, Crystal Lite had to go), I started to feel better, but my symptoms did not completely go away until I said goodbye to all processed foods.

By goodbye, I do mean a legitimate farewell to bread, pasta, cheese (not all, but most), cereal, soup, sauces, sausage, lunch meats, etc. Even chocolate, the fancy kind, is off limits as the miniscule amounts of chemicals in it have sent me running for Benadryl.

Why am I taking the time to blog about all of this? Well, in all of the misery I have been having - such as withdrawal symptoms,  and the sadness of leaving behind an entire life style- I realized today that my shirts are much looser around the waist. So loose, in fact, that I am able to pull them out several inches.

The craziness of all of that is that my calorie intake is not lower than it was while eating processed foods (it is approximately the same, if not a little higher in cookie with real butter), and my exercise amounts are down - hard to push through and keep going while dealing with the exhausting detox. Yet, with all of that my body still managed to being losing weight with minimal effort on my part.

So, my suggestion for any of you who have been struggling to lose, and do not know why it has not happened yet, give clean eating a try. It is hard, and a hassle, but the rewards (not just in weight loss) are well worth it. Hopefully, my body keeps it up!

Help Wanted

Photo courtesy of www.fccgreensboro.org

Today, Mama Kat had multiple options for prompts, but the one that screamed at me was "a blog inspired by the word help". I can do that. It seems like I am either always needing it (and getting next to none) or always giving it. After all, help is what makes the world go round.

Except when the ability to say no to it makes life come to a grinding halt. The root reason, I believe, that most of us help is because we like to feel needed and wanted. I don't know many who say that their life's ambition is to 100% self reliant, no help from others, and no one left behind that would have those cherished memories of the things we have done for/with them. The problem, though, is when it feels impossible to say no. Why a simple, two letter word, should be so difficult to spit out I do not understand. And I am the queen of avoiding it. I immediately become red all over, start sweating, and can no longer look someone in the eye before saying it. The next part is a long list of justifications for why I cannot help out with whatever the project at hand is. How, though, as a woman who works, goes to school, is married (and husband just started working nights), has elementary aged children, volunteer, etc supposed to drop everything to help whenever it's needed? I'll tell you: the answer is less sleep, more screaming, and eyebrows that haven't been waxed in months (that last part, though, may just be because I'm lazy). The other two options are to 1. stop talking to all of your friends, or 2. buck up and say no. I have yet to start implementing #2, I should probably work on that.

The flip side to this help debacle is the inability to actually ask for it. Or to follow through with getting the help after finally asking. It seems there is a big panic that comes through after someone offers to help of "what if I look to weak", or "crap, I need to scrub my house now". When that panic comes, cancelling the help usually immediately proceeds. In reality, if I'm desperate enough to reach out and ask for help, I should not be concerned how I appear, what my house looks like, how crazy my kids are acting, etc. Help is necessary (remember, it's what makes the world go round), and I should not be too weak to accept it.

So, it's my turn to say that I need help. A lot of it. There is so much going on, and so much to juggle that life feels pretty lonely some times (how, with a houseful, I do not know). Friends and family, be warned, the time has come for me to start asking. And to start saying no. I like how that sounds.

Watching the Game with Sportsmanship

I've never written a football post before, but have decided that if I ever will, now is the time. Before I get started, let me declare here that I am a die hard Patriots fan (and no amount of criticism will take that away), and am definitely not a 12. What I have to say, though, applies to every single football fan, including myself. Again, I say that a lot of this I have told myself over the last year, after my own, personal, behavior last Super Bowl season where I lost the good sportsmanship award by a landslide.

1. If another team is accused of doing something, hopping on the bandwagon in saying/screaming/ranting etc against them really isn't needed. Accusations mean nothing. They do not prove anything was done, and are a tool of the NFL to get more people involved in watching games, and keeping football on the mind. If something comes out verifying that accusation ABC was true, then rant away. Until then, behave like decent human beings in a country where you're supposed to be innocent until proven guilty. In this particular case, the Patriots are guilty even when proved innocent, and then some.

2. If you lose, be more like Russell Wilson. Can't believe I just said that, but the man has quite the character, and if he can lose and start planning for the next time, then I'm pretty certain you all can too. This, by the way, applies to any fan of any team. A quick "oh man, that sucks, I wish team XYZ would win" is enough, then start setting sights for next year. There are more than enough teams around that will end up taking the slot that your own person team wants, and there's no need to pout over it.

3. If a play was made that was bad, rant away, but do so where the rest of the world can't see that you're now tearing apart members of the coaching department. It's not needed, it's not necessary, and it makes the entire state look as though we cannot handle a mistake. My heart aches for Rob Lowe, who, yes, made a very bad call, but is a human being. As a human being, he should be allowed to wake up this morning and not see 50 million memes about himself from the fans of his own team. Not classy, not cool, not okay. If you stand by a team, stand by them. Otherwise, brace yourselves and grin and bear it when the bandwagon jabs come your way.

4. If the players are able to see who won/lost and immediately go over and shake hands, and act like cordial human beings, then why can't we? There's a great picture of Sherman leaning down to shake Brady's hand last night, after being emotionally crushed by the defeat. If they can do it, then we should be able to congratulate one another, without throwing in a dig on why our team lost. No "congratulations, good game, but if it weren't for ... ". A simple "congratulations" will suffice, and then you can go to your buddy's and quietly rant.

5. If you have decided to slam others for not being a fan of your team, you may need to re-evaluate your priorities. Football is fast turning into the new religion/politics of the lets-just-not-go-there-or-else-get-into-a-brawl topics. There are 32 teams in the NFL. 32. Just for impact, I'll say it again, there are thirty two teams in the NFL. To go along with all of those teams, are fans. And just because their team did not make it to the playoffs, or the Super Bowl, does not mean they are required to choose sides and cheer anyone else on. Maybe they can watch for the love of the game (some of us do that), or for a variety of other reasons. Going off on groups of people for being whiny because their team lost, and now they can't cheer yours on is pointless. There have been many Super Bowls where I honestly did not care one bit who won, still watched (it's tradition), and that was the end. Let people love who they want to love, just as you expect them to do for you.

Honestly, can't we all behave towards a group of hard working men in the exact same way we expect them to be on the field? Be aggressive, have passion, show your love for that game. Keep the integrity (yep, this Pats fan just said it), compassion, understanding, and good sportsmanship present. A lot of the digs made at one another last far longer than football season. Is it really worth it, when our own personal comments have 0 chance of changing the outcome of the game?

And, lastly, congratulations to the Seattle Seahawks for the return to the Super Bowl after their first time ever winning. You all created a great game, and made a dynasty fight every step of the way for the win. You showed a nation that last years landslide defeat happened for a reason. Now, give your offensive coordinator a break, and prep to bring it even harder next year.

Last, last thing: Patriots, woot, you made this girl proud!!!!!